Exploring Sex & Sexuality with Juliet Allen
Juliet Allen is a leading Australian sexologist whose passion is helping people connect to their sexual self.
WHERE DID YOUR INTEREST IN BECOMING A SEXOLOGIST FIRST ARISE FROM?
HOW DO YOU DEFINE SEX? IS IT SIMPLY THE ACT OF SEXUAL INTERCOURSE OR IS IT MUCH MORE THAN THAT?
WHAT MAKES YOU SO PASSIONATE ABOUT TEACHING AND HELPING OTHERS AROUND SEX AND SEXUALITY?
HOW DID YOU GET TO WHERE YOU ARE TODAY AS ONE OF AUSTRALIA'S LEADING SEXOLOGISTS?
Well firstly it's an absolute honour to be given that title! I believe there's a few contributing factors that have supported me to get to where I am in my career. First, I love business - I love to learn about how to run an effective and impactful business that gives me freedom and abundance, and also supports my dream lifestyle. So I've always had a business coach, and I surround myself with like-minded entrepreneurs who inspire me. Secondly, I don't teach about anything I haven't experienced myself in life, and my goal is to be super authentic and real. I believe this approach as a teacher has contributed greatly to my success. And thirdly, I'm very picky about my brand and making things look and feel amazing. So visually, I believe I have a brand that is beautiful (and that helps in the age of social media!).
WHAT ARE PEOPLE'S BIGGEST FEARS OR LIMITATIONS AROUND EMBRACING THEIR SEXUALITY AND ENJOYING SEX?
Well sex is still so taboo, so just talking about it or reading about it can bring up a lot of fear in people - fear of being judged, of being shamed and guilted, of being rejected. Unfortunately many religions don't include the importance of sexuality and sexual exploration in their teachings, which leads to thousands of years of shame and guilt. The other reason people can feel fear is because they fear the power that they would feel if they truly tapped into their sexual energy and listened to it... this is an unconscious fear that many people experience (more about this in my Authentic Sex podcast and Pleasure School!).
SELF-PLEASURE IS ALSO A TABOO TOPIC IN SOME CIRCLES. HOW CAN WE CREATE OPEN DISCUSSIONS AND FEEL MORE COMFORTABLE TALKING ABOUT MASTURBATION?
Well firstly, we have to begin exploring self-pleasure more as individuals! Self-pleasure is a beautiful way to connect with our true sexual essence. It gives us insight into what we enjoy, what turns us on and how we enjoy being touched. When we learn to self-pleasure we understand ourselves better and in turn can experience powerful sex with others. I believe we just need to start talking about it more with friends and family, even if it feels weird or taboo. We also need to talk about it to our younger generation, and explain it's a normal and natural way of exploring and expressing a big part of who we are.
IF YOU COULD GIVE ONE PIECE OF ADVICE TO THOSE WHO STRUGGLE TO FEEL SEXY AND POWERFUL, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Seek support - find a coach or therapist who works in the area of sexuality and work with them to explore what's holding you back. Read books, seek out courses and online workshops - find someone who you resonate with in this area and learn from them. We can't do it alone. I can't do it alone. We're all in this together and seeking support to explore this part of ourselves is vital.
Juliet Allen, sexologist ~ @juliet_allen
WORDS BY ALEX CARROLL